One complaint we sometimes see in this site's reader reviews, often about otherwise good restaurants, is a sense of being rushed. Gotta admit, this is a pet peeve of ours, especially at a higher-end establishment. I want to have time to sip on my wine and enjoy some good conversation in between courses. When entrees arrive before we've even finished appetizers or salad, that really reduces the enjoyment of our meal. If we want fast food, we'll go to Milo's.

We never have that problem anymore, because here's what we started doing: We refuse to order our entrees at the same time we order our appetizers. Even if we already know what we want for the main event, when we order the appetizer, we tell our server we haven't decided yet on the entrees and will wait to order until after we've finished our appetizer. If they don't take the hint and come ask us again for our order, we'll nicely tell them that we aren't in a hurry, that we want to take the time to really enjoy the meal. As a result, it's not unusual for us to spend two or three hours having a three-course dinner.

We enjoy each bite, each sip. In between courses we get a chance to talk, or may enjoy a chance to chat with our server or the owner or the restaurant's resident wine expert, whether it be a formal sommelier or a particularly wine-savvy server.

We've never really had any problems with this approach. In fact, servers and restaurant owners often seem to really appreciate the fact that we want to take time to fully enjoy the meal.

How many times have you been at one of your favorite restaurants enjoying the food, along with its aroma, only to have it ruined? No, I am not taking about cigarette smoke. (I will leave that up to the restaurant reviewer Susan Swagler with The Birmingham News, who can’t do a review without griping about smoking if she sees anyone smoking within 50 yards of a restaurant.)

No, dear readers, I am talking about something more insidious. It’s something you have no control over, unlike choosing whether or not to go to a restaurant or bar that allows smoking. I am talking about diners wearing too much perfume. And unfortunately, it seems to be an increasingly common occurrence. Mind you, I am not talking about a light whiff of perfume from someone walking by, but about someone sitting near you who smells like they bathed in it. I am talking strong enough to drown out garlic and onions.

Now a new study says there may be a reason. Researchers at Tel Aviv University have concluded women who doll up with too much perfume might not know it because they are depressed. According to one researcher, scientific studies suggest that women who are depressed are also losing their sense of smell and may overcompensate by using more perfume.

Don’t get me wrong, depression is a serious illness. And I am not picking on women. It happens nearly often as much with men.

But this story out of Israel reminds me of something I’ve been wanting to say for along time. I don’t care if your perfume came from the dime store or runs more than a hundred bucks an ounce and was made by Monks in a French monastery -- for the love of my food and the consideration of other diners, please limit it to just a small amount when dining, not enough to make a perfume Martini.

In the meantime, if I'm ever in Santa Fe, I'll be sure to visit Trattoria Nostrani, which notes on its web site that it has a "fragrance free environment" and asks diners to refrain from wearing cologne or perfume along with not using cell phones.

1. Jean Georges in New York City. The atmosphere, the food, the service (the prices!) were all incredible, a true experience, not just a meal. A turbot dish had Evan raving, and he's not normally that big a fan of white fish. Each dish had complex layers of flavors, with sauces, coatings and foams, so that in once case, even where I wasn't sure if I actually liked the dish, it was just so darn interesting that I had to finish it.

2. Chef's table at (local) bar and restaurant. Ten courses showcasing chef Anthony Marini's creativity with only minimal guidance on our likes and dislikes mixed more traditional fare such as hangar steak and potatoes with new experiences such as sea beans and pork belly. (Read all about it here.) Local is temporarily closed while Marini moves to a new location.
 
3. Whole Foods opening. Our first visit to Whole Foods, we were nearly overwhelmed by the selection of produce, meat, cheese, prepared foods and organic goods. We especially love the quality of their meats, and have discovered bison steaks. The nickname "whole paycheck" is not because their prices are unreasonable – in fact, their house brand, "365," offers some great values on many items. If you were to buy these type of organic and specialty items at other stores in town (assuming you could find them), you'd find in many cases Whole Foods is cheaper. But high-quality, organic, natural and specialty foods simply cost more.

Much as we love Whole Foods, though, they have not replaced local places like V. Richard's and Tria Market in our hearts. Sometimes Whole Foods is just too big, and doesn't offer the same level of service. For instance, while the cheese selection at Whole Foods is probably two to three times that of Tria Market, I really prefer going to Tria, where they will happily let you sample cheese until you find the one you like. The baked goods at Tria and V. Richards are much better than those at Whole Foods (although WH does some great fruit pies.) And, of course, you can't get things like foie gras pate and caviar at Whole Foods.

4. Aquavit in NYC – especially the steelhead trout cooked in duck fat. Incredibly rich.

5. A beachside-balcony picnic with our 5-year-old on our first trip to the beach, with fresh Gulf boiled shrimp from Goatfeathers II, quick homemade pasta salad, brie, olives, and hummus and pitas.

6. Soul food at Eagle's Restaurant. We'd never had soul food before; this is to Southern meat-and-three what black gospel music is to staid Protestant hymnals. (Read review here)

7. Discovering cocktails at Highlands Bar & Grill. We've always enjoyed the ever-changing wine by the glass list so much that we never really ventured into the cocktail menu. When we finally did, we were thrilled to discover real adult cocktails, some classic, some unique to Highlands. None of these super-sweet drinks that think they're martinis simply because they're in a martini glass. There's the famous "Orange Thang," which was invented by accident. My favorite is the Highlands Refresher, where the syrupy sweetness of Drambuie is tamed with lemon juice, soda and a dash of bitters. And don't miss the seasonal cocktail featured at the top of the dinner menu. In the summer, it's often a peach bellini; on a recent visit, it was a blood orange mimosa.

8. Iguana Grill in Hoover. While the food is quite good (although the green salt on the margarita rim is kind of scary), what is really impressive about this restaurant on Lorna is the décor. The creation of a noted Mexican interior designer, the interior boasts dozens of metal star-shaped lanterns and other beautiful lights, metal artwork and rich, bold colors. (Read review here)

9. Eating at Las Halles in New York City, Anthony Bordain's place. This is a French bistro with New York attitude. The steaks and fries were excellent, we had a marvelous bottle of French red wine, and the salad got us addicted to frisee.

10. Enjoying a three-hour meal at a small restaurant called Zinnia in the St. Louis area to celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday. While the food was good and the event delightful, the real memorable part was that our then-4-year-old daughter was beautifully behaved through the whole thing! (OK, we did use bribery with Skittles and had some new mini-coloring books to keep her occupied, but still, for a 4-year-old, that's impressive.)

Seems like a lot of holiday traditions revolve around food. One of my favorites is Christmas cookies. In the weeks before Christmas, I made crullers – donuts deep-fried in lard, a recipe passed down from my maternal great-grandmother's side of the family; pecan fingers and Scotch shortbreads, passed down from my paternal great-grandmother; and cookie-cutter, icing-and-sprinkle-decorated sugar cookies to please my 5-year-old (who would rather make them than eat them). I ran out of time to make rum balls, a recipe from my stepmother that makes me smile every time I read the recipe card and it instructs the cook to drink some of the rum and dance around the kitchen.

If you read my essay in the December/January issue of the new Lipstick magazine, you will have discovered that I have occasionally found holiday dinners challenging. While this year wasn't as bad as the year I tried to make Frank Stitt's famous grits appetizer, we did have a slight snafu. We had two separate family dinners planned, one for Christmas Eve and one for Christmas Day. We decided to get a big boneless ribeye roast, cook it Christmas Eve and have plenty left for Christmas Day. So, we thought, we have Evan, myself, my sister, her husband, our daughter, and Evan's mom and dad. We ordered 6.5 pounds, enough for a pound each (half for the 5-year-old). Have you figured it out yet? We forgot to figure in the fact that Evan and I and our daughter were eating TWICE! So we cut the leftovers thin and turned them into open-faced prime rib sandwiches, with sauteed mushrooms and shallots, topped with provolone cheese. There was enough -- barely!

I also received a few food-related gifts this Christmas. The folks over at Primavera Coffee Roasters in Cahaba Heights sent us a half-pound of one of their "Cup of Excellence" coffees, from a small Brazilian coffee farm that has been in the family since 1890. We drink pretty decent coffee (Starbucks or Whole Foods' house brand or O'Henry's), but this made our normal coffee seem like Maxwell House! Also, a dear friend gave me the Lee Bros. Southern Cookbook. It is a blast to read the brothers' tales of their experiences spending their formative years in Charleston, trying to sell boiled peanuts in New York, and the many interesting characters they have met in the South. The recipes range from basic fried chicken to corncob wine.